by Pam Clark (

Have you ever noticed there are people who try to help you birth a baby? That is really something only you can do yourself. Most birthing is painful and a bit messy but there will be those who have plenty of advice in telling you how to do it.

Some will tell you the pain is not real. Not sure where they are coming from, but you can look at them like you know they are crazy.

Some can tell you, "Oh it's alright, it will be over soon. Just look at it positively!" But's it not their guts being ripped apart with blood spilling.

Some will try to make you look on the sunny side of life in your most painful hour when what you really need is a little bit of compassion.

Some will give you all the options - at a time when you are not in any position to take advantage of any of them. Some will philosophize to you when they aren't the ones enduring.

Now there are people you do want to have around when you birth a baby. A doctor is most helpful and assuring. There is a skilled trust there that lets you know this person has studied this procedure and they can help. They even have some tools of the trade to assist you. Thank God for skilled doctors!

Sometimes a mother or another woman who has been through it is most comforting. They aren't going to tell you it doesn't hurt when it does, and that it doesn't matter when something matters very much.

They aren't going to tell you to just trivialize something that is demanding all your life energies and they won't lecture you on all the things you "should be" doing when you can't do a darn thing about it!

They won't say "Oh God will just take care of it, put it on Him" when you are the one screaming and feeling the pain of it with every member of your body!

Another person that is good to have around is the father of the baby, because this is an investment you have together. Sometimes they don't understand what you feel but they realize the investment is something worth putting themselves into.

At times like this, even other family members can be helpful and assisting because they really love you and have compassion for your struggle and trial.

Sometimes I wonder when the Body of Christ will get it. Some are so caught in their world they can't relate to what another person is going through. Some don't realize how much more forgiveness is being demanded of them by this ingratutious "help."

But once that baby is born, everyone will rejoice, especially if both mother and baby are okay. It doesn't make the pain any less traumatic, but it is easier to forget once the baby gets here, and that's a relief! Some might even be jealous at your prize (not willing to pay their own price). It happens. Don't lose your joy.

It cost something to birth something. Ask Jesus about Calvary.

Let's not be hypocrites about what it costs people to deliver growth in the Body. We may not understand the pain, but we should try to have compassion for it. Making judgments while people are down can be a most unChristian thing for a person to do. It comes off more like the devil!

A lot of things can look good on Sunday morning when we've had all week to prepare. But life has to be lived in the week inbetween, as well.

Just because a mother experiences excruciating pain at childbirth, does it mean she necessarily committed un-original sin? We all struggle in this world!

Some mothers even lose their babies. Does that mean that they didn't care or didn't try? Of course not!!! They may even feel their loss and pain all the more in trying to contribute something to the world.

Of course I am talking about Christians travailing in prayer, as well as the natural order of things.

Let's have compassion!

Let's be honest about what it really takes to live. To everything there is a season! Productive seasons may demand your help, if you are generous and can give it.

Do we really know what God wants? Can we get real?

Christianity is not a fantasy, even though some are addicted to that "feeling" that it is. Have you found your place of true life purposeful living?

Are you part of the problem or the solution?